So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
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They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
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no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize