Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize