I need help removing her.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
