no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
