dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
