Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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