The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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