I wish they made helmets for livers.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
