After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
