Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?

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(312): Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place? http://tfl.nu/b6u5

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(865): View more from Tennessee

he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.

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(865): he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers. http://tfl.nu/fhwb

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(847): View more from Illinois

you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.

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(847): you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life. http://tfl.nu/71wd

Replies (25) Good night (12728) Bad night (1038)
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(770): View more from Georgia

who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!

(404): View more from Georgia

you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.

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(770): who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!! (404): you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship. http://tfl.nu/9p9t

Replies (36) Good night (6421) Bad night (1294)
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(516): View more from New York

There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed

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(516): There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed http://tfl.nu/zayy

Replies (5) Good night (4819) Bad night (728) Order T-Shirt
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(828): View more from North Carolina

I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.

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(828): I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh. http://tfl.nu/gg69

Replies (5) Good night (484) Bad night (2027) Order T-Shirt
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(209): View more from California

I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside

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(209): I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside http://tfl.nu/5a48

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(507): View more from Minnesota

I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)

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(507): I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!) http://tfl.nu/tvr2

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(904): View more from Florida

Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?

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(904): Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already? http://tfl.nu/3n3w

Replies (6) Good night (1606) Bad night (439)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.

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(847): I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it. http://tfl.nu/gdcc

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(573): View more from Missouri

These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.

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(573): These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times. http://tfl.nu/8sq6

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.

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(612): Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement. http://tfl.nu/cvtk

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(541): View more from Oregon

Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?

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(541): Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am? http://tfl.nu/ak1s

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(619): View more from California

No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.

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(619): No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch. http://tfl.nu/4axa

Replies (6) Good night (2964) Bad night (425)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on

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(508): he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on http://tfl.nu/t183

Replies (5) Good night (798) Bad night (235)

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