You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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