wat bout pragnant strippers??
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
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