I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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