Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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