There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
You pole danced in your parka.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian