i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
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