I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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