He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
