fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
