just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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