Midget sex pt 2 tonight
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Your cock deserves a montage
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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