I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
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