hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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