I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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