At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
