Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
