yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Success! We fucked roommates!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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