Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
