"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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