If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
