after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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