would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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