Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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