when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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