just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
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