I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize