Having a random hookup so left but love u
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
he fucked my hip out of place.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
