the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
