i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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