i permit you to call me
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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