is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
