She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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