pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
