If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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