We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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