I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
