i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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