Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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