I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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