very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
